humor, nanowrimo, Writing

How to survive NaNoWriMo sane

Okay so writing 50k in a month seems like and is insanity. But we do it because we are nutbars. But how do we stay at least a little sane?

How to survive NaNoWriMo Sane
  1. First analyze your actual level of sanity. Are you nutty nutty nutbars already? Then cool, it won’t affect you at all. And if it does, no one will notice that extra smidgen of nuttiness. Are you just weird or eccentric or ‘quirky’… well, then writing 50k may or may not drive you into nutbar territory. I wouldn’t know really. I am full on nutbars.
  2. Once you know your level of writer crazy you want to Maintain that level as you force the words out every day to make you word count NO MATTER WHAT. Drinking to calm your nerves when you are interrupted for the 100th time is entirely acceptable. 10 bottles of wine though and you have started to teeter into excessiveness and excessiveness leads to nuttiness. But so does denial. So… moderately drink the stress away.
  3. Add a random character named Bob that you will then randomly kill later in some randomly chosen fashion. Spontaneous combustion. Piano fell on him. All his bones broke accidently. Words did hurt more that stones and he died from what someone said. Whatever. And presto… that is at least 5000 words. You’re welcome.
  4. Add it 15 errotic, long, infinitely detailed sex scenes that really have nothing to do with the plot at all but, hey, your characters need to get it on too. That there is 10k words. You’re welcome. However, now your book is erotica. So there is that.
  5. Describe the scenery. A lot. A whole lot. It is vital that people know what colour the curtains are so that they can later make some weird symbolic connection to that colour and the theme of your novel. And again think of all the plentiful Words needed t describe every single room, every tree and lake, every skyscraper, every mustache hair. Frankly, people will be astounded at your attention to detail.
  6. Smoke the pot if it is legal and you got it.
  7. Take a long nap
  8. Have the munchies
  9. You hit 50k! Yay!
  10. Now when you edit- erase 55.7% of all that crapola.

Anyway, I have 10K to go and clearly I am not writing it since I am writing this. So… time to add some random sex scenes. Maybe some murders. A natural disaster? A PLAGUE? YES! And now I have a zombie apocalypse novel. Huh.

And sanity is optional. We are all nutty here. We are writers. It is a given. Just what degree of nutbar you are.

See more on the Nano

Almost November: NaNoWriMo time
NaNoWriMo: One mistake not to make
Reading some tips for Nano

Buy Me a Coffee at

3 thoughts on “How to survive NaNoWriMo sane”

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