A short: Guns and Unicorns

Writing Prompts that don’t suck: Story must include a unicorn hunter, a planet inhabited entirely by cats, a glitter gun.

Meow?

“This is clearly the wrong world, Lawrence,” Eva said crossly as she pulled a climbing kitten from her leg and put it on the ground.

They were in an empty city. An apocalypse world likely. But whatever killed them had not killed the fifty or so feral cats they’d had as pets. Or more likely since domestic cats usually died when left to their own devices these were the feral colonies already in the city. By the looks of the overgrown area, they had plenty of birds and rodents to go after. They simply happened to land in a sort of communal area they had picked out. From all the hissing and growling they were not too pleased about it either. Some though just stared in a nice creeping fashion reminding Eva of a novel of her grandmother’s she found as a child by Steven King. There had been a collection. Now she was thinking dying by a swarm of evil cats ought to have been in them. It looked like they had a hive mind from the looks they were getting.

The damn kitten was up her leg again. She plucked it free by the scruff of the neck and cuddled it gently. Hopefully, that would appease the feral mob.

Lawrence fiddled with his damn Alternate Realities Unit. It was a mini computer really but the hologram presented was a map of worlds they had been to before. He knew it like the back of his hands. Twenty-five strings of planets in alternate forms. They had explored thirty Earth forms so far.

“Yeah, this is Earth Series 15. Pandemic created by man to be the perfect viral weapon was released and killed everything as it evolved, except cats. All felines,” he said. “As carnivorous we don’t expect them to last long really.”

“Awesome. What am I doing here when I paid you to bring me to Fantasia Series 2?”

“Slippage. We are trying to resolve the problem but sometimes there is slippage and we get knocked into another path.”

“Fix it.” Her kitten was now purring as she gently scrubbed his head through her thin suit gloves. She would keep it if not for the fact it was carrying a dangerous disease. Or the cure? Whatever. Not worth a cute kitten.

“Got it!” he said. He gave her a pointed look and she carefully put the kitten down. He flicked the switch and they stretched into a tunnel of light landing on the other side in an open field.

Eva pulled out her glitter gun, so named because it shot a beam that glittered like diamond and was, after all, for shooting a unicorn. She looked across the plain and spotted a few of them grazing. Should be easy. She was after all a qualified hunter. And a virgin. Other hunters had to find their own virgins but she was herself the bait.

“What are you doing here anyway? Taking pictures? They have a wonderful herd of… is that a glitter gun? You’re not a hunter are you?”

“Yeah, so? Their horns have magical properties, Lawrence. Do you have any idea what that means for research? Magic. Imagine the new frontiers.”

Already the unicorns were tentatively drawing nearer. Lawrence would have to move before they would fully approach her.

“Leave. They won’t come with you here.”

“I won’t. You never said you were doing something illegal. Trophy hunting is as illegal here as at home. I’m afraid we are going home and I will report you.”

Eva turned to face him, her gun trained on him. “I would not do that if I were you. You will let me handle my business and we will be on our way.”

Lawrence waved his hand upward, “Hastinata par!”

She felt flat on her face. She tried to get up but it was like a pressure was holding her down.

Lawrence knelt down. “Magic exists. Not in your Earth but in mine. This Alternate Realities Unit? Magic. Magic we have shared with your government. Under certain conditions. So understand I know about magic already. As does your government.”

“Let me up,” she said.

“Not until we are home. At your home anyway. You can tell the authorities all about your trophy hunting misadventure then.” He leaned in closer. “You’re fucking lucky. On my world, we would kill anyone who dared to kill a unicorn. Trophy hunters disgust me.”

He held out the Alternate Realities Unit and moved the alignment around. “It is possible our people will ban you from Traveling. I would suggest you learn some respect for your environment because we have determined with a fair degree of certainty yours is on its last legs. You all have about twenty years left. I know you were aware of all the effects of global warming. The storms. Flooding. Fires. Rising waters. Starvation. War. You know it is all culminating. So I suggest you wise up because we came here to find you a new home. We have with the help of your government set up assigned research teams to pattern out planets that may be able to sustain you. We control the way through, Eva. If you become marked not to Travel you have doomed yourself.”

He looked down at her. “Personally, I think Earth 1 will doom itself again and again. None of you have learned any lessons. You, in particular, think that animals life was worth a horn. How much will your new planet be worth? It’s environment? It’s animals? I guess we will see.”

*flick*